Athena Sobhan

Hello! I hope y’all didn’t miss me too much! Soooo much has happened since my last post in 2016 when I finished up my study abroad series. Basically, I finished up the rest of my classes, worked at the school newspaper, The Daily Titan, worked two internships, travelled around Europe, started two new jobs, and finished school somewhere in between.

It feels like I blinked and BAM! It’s suddenly a year since I graduated college. It’s weird to watch some of the people I know still going to school, thinking about tests and term papers and I’m going to work and worrying about 401k’s and health insurance.

Post-grad life is strange. I’ve been in school since I was three and suddenly I’m… not. Yeah, its nice to not worry about homework and taking classes that make me want to gouge my eyes out, but there’s suddenly a void in my life.  I don’t get to see my friends as often with all of us trying to adult… and moving home and seeing people who I haven’t seen since high school is not pleasant, let me tell you.

In college, there’s more opportunity to meet new people in classes, clubs, in the library. Nobody told me that when you’re done with all of that, making new friends is way harder because all I want to do after work is stay inside and relax.

While classes were typically stressful with all the homework, projects, and tests (ESPECIALLY FINALS) , I really enjoyed learning. I didn’t realize how much I miss it until I was no longer in school. One of the things I really regret is not taking enough cool classes in college. I made decisions to not take classes because of fear and wanting to just get the hell out of college. But I can’t help but wonder if things would be different if I took one more semester or if I took the classes I REALLY wanted to.

Well nothing I can really do about that now can I?

This year out of college has been a rollercoaster for me personally. Dealing with family issues and adjusting to this new life has been difficult and stressful, but I think I’ve pulled through alright. I can’t complain about my situation right now. I am grateful to have a roof over my head and a good job that pays. But I know that I am meant for so much more.

I know I am at the beginning of my career and my adult life, but I already feel like I’m falling behind. It can be so easy to lose perspective when you’re so wrapped up in everything and I am definitely guilty of that.

I tend to be really hard on myself and bury myself in my doubts and darker thoughts. But the one thing I’ve always been confident in are my writing skills. When things get difficult, I remember that I may not be where I want to be right now, but I will be down the road. I have to just keep my eye on the prize.

So while I miss being in school and the comfort of knowing what’s ahead, I am ready to take the world by storm, I know I’m meant to make a difference in the world and to help people. I’m meant to live in London for longer than three months. I’m meant to be best friends with Harry Styles (well a girl can only dream LOL).

All of these things I know are in my cards, I just have to stop letting my self-doubt get in the way of all of that.